A guest is late for the meal: say when the family will begin
By Erik Nilsen · Kroni2 min read
Your family plans to eat at six with an aunt. At quarter past six she is still travelling. A child asks whether you can start, while an adult wants to wait a little longer. Nobody knows how long “a little” means, and the atmosphere around the food begins to overshadow the visit.
The host can make the decision and inform the guest. A child does not need to be the person asking permission for the entire family to start eating.
Establish whether there is a new time
A short message could say: “We will begin eating at half past six. Come when you can, and we will work something out when you arrive.” If your aunt gives an expected arrival time, consider it. An estimate remains an estimate, however, and you can begin at the stated time even if she is still delayed.
Avoid saying the family is starting because the child refuses to wait. This is a hosting decision about a meal, rather than a public assessment of the child's patience.
Decide what happens on arrival
Perhaps the guest can join you while you are eating. Perhaps the family will have finished and an adult can sit with the guest for a while. Explain that kindly before she arrives if you already know the arrangement.
Choose the food arrangement according to what you are actually serving. Avoid promising that any dish can stay out all evening. If you are unsure about storage or reheating, follow the product instructions or choose another simple option.
Keep the family's other commitments
A delayed meal need not move everything that follows. Your child may still have an agreed game period or an established end to the evening. Explain that the guest is welcome to continue talking with the adults when the child moves on.
After the visit, consider whether the next invitation should say “we serve dinner at six” rather than merely “come around six.” This distinguishes arrival from the start of the meal. A welcoming visit can include a practical start time that the family actually keeps.
